Sago

Sago was released in 2008. It subsequently received no commercial recognition.

 

C r e d i t s

All material written/performed/recorded by Paul Weber in San Francisco with artistic/technical assistance from Celso Alberti, Micropixie, Gary Pillai, Hilary Weber, Stuart Rosenthal and Eric Altman. Package design by Robin Dick. Cover Photo by David Westby. Mastered at the Lodge by Emily Lazar and Joe LaPorta. Produced by Paul Weber for Motisonic, a division of M4moti, Inc.

(C) & (P) 2008 Paul Dhillon Weber, All rights reserved. No portion of this recording may be used without expressed authorisation of the author.

L y r i c s

The Disappearing Me // Slightly // Cat and Mouse // Save the Best // Shadow of a Doubt // Jeddah Tarmacadam // Enough // The End // Gamme Quatre // Say Goodbye to the Empire // Moonbeam


T h e D i s a p p e a r i n g M e

Through this window I bear witness to more and more
That I can see will set me free
In these times the space between you and me
Remains cloudy and undefined
Beneath malevolence is a buoyancy of spirit
That I’ve hitherto failed grasp
Between the lines I note the deconstructed elements
That reveal the disappearing me

So where am I now?
From what have I come?
What more can I truly want?
When everything good in here abounds
Splendidly calm
Sufficiently clean
To dignify the fading king
The honour the disappearing me

Through this window memories come and go
Just like passing cars in the road below
I once walked among the mystified and sterilised
To search for more in this spongy park
Twilight comes in the most unexpected ways throughout my day
To test my will and my resolve
To be loved was once just a sentiment
I thought had been bestowed on me from above

Chorus

Through this window I bear witness to more and more
That can see will set me free

Gary Pillai is Hamlet

S l i g h t l y

 

I want to be good, I want to be safe
Don’t want to make mistakes without you
I’m watching for cracks and minding my back
Don’t want to wait and see it all come unglued with you

I am slightly risk averse
Please don’t make a fuss over it

I drive in my car, but never too fast
Don’t want to loose control and eat both gravel and glass
I’m taking a chance and weighing my odds
‘cause I want to be so secure about you

Drums: Celso Alberti

 

C a t a n d M o u s e

 

 

I’m stranded on the outer shores
Don’t think I’ve slept a wink
When kicking with such splendid folks you loose yourself and sink
Socialised and patronised by Dulles in Berlin
Who’s obsolete when the chips are down?
This spy’s not coming in so…

Here I am, no! Here I am, Hey! Here I am
We’ve got no time for this cat and mouse
Cat and mouse, cat and mouse
When they try to bring you down

I swam out to this Chinese sub
A calling from Beijing
Abducted by some Latvian thugs here on holiday
Met a spook the other day who put the fix on me
I dropped the fuck like shit on fire from the back of an aeroplane and…

The collar jack has met his match
Natalia sleeps with Jake
We’re doping friends along the way
So no one make mistakes
Not a shred of evidence
No directives or smoking gun
I’m moving on to higher ground
You know I won’t be found but…

Drums: Celso Alberti

 

S a v e t h e B e s t

 

I know you’ve been around the block
This much you can’t hide from me
And I guess I haven’t made it too easy
Yet you choose to shine your light on me

I know you’ve saved the best for me
I can see it in your smile
It’s the way you wash and rinse your hair
It’s the way you show you care

Jasmine, rose and hyacinth
Scent the places where you’ve been so pervasively
Bruises, cuts and vile remarks
Were delivered approximately here

I think you’d like to open my mouth
And stuff it with a sock and leave it there
And when you’re feeling up to it
You can parade me round your friends on a lead

Drums: Celso Alberti

S h a d o w o f a D o u b t

 

 

The choice was clear
Beyond a shadow of a doubt
It wasn’t like anyone was watching out
Watching out
Another chance
Is this it – my stop coming up
Its not as easy as I thought it’d be
Who could say it wouldn’t matter in such a careless way?
Who can say it will not matter anyway?

Though I always seem do the right thing
I see no guarantees I’ll be okay
And through these tricky paths and slippery slopes
I’m falling down

I know this room
Beyond a shadow of a doubt
It wasn’t like I didn’t know how to shut my feeling down
Shut them down
Your motive’s clear
Beyond any passion I can doubt
Damning too many options with sagacity
Leading all those sordid thoughts through tangencies
Ceding all these stupid dreams to reality

Filterlams: Jupiter 6 and Pro-One

J e d d a h T a r m a c a d a m

(instrumental)

E n o u g h

It’s not enough to make you believe
It’s not enough know what you need
It’s not enough to let anyone know
Just how you feel and what is not real when you first learned
You’re not enough for mom and dad
You’re not enough for your fellow man
Its not enough to stand up and say
“When Black Dog’s comes round I’ll keep to myself and I’ll just play it low”
But, it’s not enough

So why can’t feel good with all we give to you
Why can’t you be cool with all we make you do
Why can’t you come through the way we comfort you
Why can’t you be more, indulge enough to follow us

The sum of the parts is unravelling fast
Synthetically rich but you know it can’t last
The words of a saint seem both trifle and dull
Synapses are cut so close to the core – it’ll leave you so cold
It’s not enough to seep along the line
It’s not enough but psychotropically fine
It’s not enough to stand apart from the race
So don’t even try, that’s not how your made and it might do you some harm
It’s not enough

You’ve got to feel good
So feel good

Dogma and Ahhs: Micropixie

 

T h e E n d

 

Are we marching forward
Toward a brand new world
Can we make a difference
Do we mean what we say
It’s all in the plan we make today

Do all distinguished travellers
Soar above the two way lanes
Or lift, then drag and plummet
Down to their stupid ways
It’s all in the words we use today

Though you can deny the optimist
Desperation is rising, it true
Its time we add just me and you
And say the end is here

The draw of a habit
Achieved with charm and appeal
A word from Damascus
Can evoke some latent fears
It’s all in the games we play today

I’d hazard on silver
That I won’t change your point of view
Now that hell is freezing over
And I see there’s nothing new

Choir of Profound Apathy: Hilary Weber

G a m m e Q u a t r e

À croire
Que je sais
Ces cognitions
Me contrôlent
Gamme un

À savoir
Que tout change
À témoigner comment
Les normes réarrangent
Gamme deux

À montrer
Comment l’étrange
Dislocation
Est notre jeu
Gamme trois

À traverser
Ces lignes
Qui motivent
Ce motif
Gamme quatre

Un, deux, trois, quatre

Croyez, savez, montrez, traversez

Tabla bols and vocals: Micropixie

 

S a y G o o d b y e t o t h e E m p i r e

You say they’re calling for bravado – all we can muster
I say we could be more aggressive and flex some muscle
It’s nice to think that all I see is ours to burn
That heroes and destiny will leave no stone unturned

Don’t tune to those distant stations – they’re warped and twisted
Where tour case for any threat is merely driven from center stage
Claiming valour courted dogma to form a sticky paste
That smeared upon our consciousness with both skill and grace

Say goodbye, say goodbye to the empire
Say goodbye, say goodbye

You say they’re rolling up nostalgia – yet sweetness lingers
I’d like to think we won’t remember those special favours
Don’t want to say we’re all at risk – nowhere to run and hide
Don’t want to think about loving anything when its time to shine

Drums by Celso Alberti

M o o n b e a m

 

Cold snow shutters to blind the others
And when they come for me
I cannot hide beneath the covers of uncertainty or need
They're spelling out their special order
Puts water on my knee
Satellites and submarines ping it straight through me

Caught on tape these random signals are stirring up my brain
Call it moonbeam, moonbeam
Annihilate these senseless potions pulsing through my veins
Moonbeam

I thought another would not stutter while drifting in a dream
Catch the breath, betray the mother
A joke that's dry and lean
If I may, if like thunder I know the tricks on me
The thread unravels round the circle
Honey sweet and clean

Chorus

Drums: Celso Alberti

Production Notes

The working title of the album was Sago Power! It was shortened to Sago for production.

Sago is the tapioca mini-spheres used to make bubble tea. This title was chosen for its ambiguity to help one distinguish it from say, Probe or Telemann's string concertos or any of Michael Gira's albums. Hopefully by the time I produce the next collection we will all be ready to dispense with album titles altogether.

This album started under different auspice at the release of Probe in 2003. I wrote most of the songs in rapid succession and originally planned to assemble a band to work out arrangements that would drive the recording effort. I thought that I sought a raw, live feel with minimal overdubbing. I was wrong -- I wanted nothing of the sort. I didn't know what I wanted.

I did want to dispatch with the Steely Dan references; I grew up listening to that music and I write music very much using that kind of harmony. Slowly, I started to strip the songs down to their minimal parts and although I will never give up on the harmonic alterations, extensions and distractions, I spelt them using other devices.

Eventually, I realised that the reworking resulted in most of the parts rewritten and recorded by me. I had left little room for a band. I called Celso Alberti in to help with drum tracking to augment my drum programming and loop creation. I then tracked the remaining guitar, bass, keys, piano and texturing. Micropixie came in to track vocals on some tracks and I managed to enlist Hilary Weber for The End. (Please note that she did so reluctantly and in opposition to her profound desire to never work with me again following the Probe sessions.)

The outro of The Disappearing Me features actor Gary Pillai. We recorded several Shakespeare sonnets in London in February of 2007. His idea was to use these pieces to lie against music that I would write. Perversion caused me to lay down a reading from Hamlet onto the end of the song and it fit perfectly -- or so I have come to believe. The song was originally about losing relevance as one advances in age; Nixon, the good King Richard, was the original genesis of the song, featuring him strolling, hands clasped behind, on the shores of San Clemente in his twilight hours.

Slightly deals with my friend and lifelong companion, insecurity. Cat and Mouse reflects nostalgically on the Cold War when hating evildoers was easier and less complicated than it is today. Save the Best honours those people I know that manage to attract creeps into their lives despite their own personal fortitude and flawless moral character. Shadow of a Doubt examines reflection and personal decisioning when tripped-up by one's flawless moral character.

One night en-route from Rome to Sanaí, Yemen, I landed in the then new King Abdulaziz International Airport in Saudi. The tarmac was littered with hundreds of vehicles with flashing blue lights and when seen from the air, it was beautiful. There are no vocals on Jeddah Tarmacadam – this is normal.

Enough kicks off the "second side" and addresses my deep disappointment in the genetic make-up of my two daughters despite passing my flawless moral character and unparalleled genetic material lustrated, with great prejudice, by my fore-begettors. I wait, like the rest of humanity, for the day when engineering one's offspring is as easy as an online selection of off-the-self options for a PC from Dell. In the meantime, I will duly administer appropriate medication to ensure unmitigated compliance from both children a prescribed by their respective medical purveyors/practitioners. I got the title from McKibben's book on the same subject.

The End is optimism spelled sideways. Gamme Quatre (Array Four) is about a circular form that spirals inward in a ratio that is in opposition to the Fibonacci sequence. Say Goodbye to the Empire is another way of spelling optimism using a four-letter word conjugated in the simple past tense.

Moonbeam is.

Finally, I realised during the creation of this collection of work that I love writing and recording music, I like mixing less so and I find the mastering/packaging aspects tedious -- hence the delay in release.